What’s the old saying? “Life is what happens to you when you are busy making plans.” I can certainly relate to that. Nothing in my life has happened the way I planned it. I planned on living in Europe and/or doing extensive traveling for awhile, I never did that. I definitely didn’t want to continue living in Texas, yet here I still am. I have four children. Three were conceived on birth control. The other one (my second) only came along after two years of trying. I never thought I’d be a stay-at-home mom, yet I am. And, I certainly never planned on having a child with… “issues”.
I say issues because it seems that getting a firm diagnosis seems to be next to impossible. I couldn’t even get anyone to believe me that there was something not quite typical (I hate to say normal because he is normal—HIS normal) about him.
I was told all sorts of things. I was told it was because he was a boy. Um, I have two other older boys. I was told it was hearing. Yeah, as I thought, his hearing tests came back perfect. I could say the magic word in a different room, on a different level of the house, in a whisper, and he’d come running. The word? Cookie. I was told it runs in families. OK, but my other two didn’t do that. No one would listen. I practically had to stand on a chair at his three year well check and insist that I just be humored. I never did call at the drop of a hat and 99.9% of the time, when I brought my kids in, they were sick with what I’d say I thought they had over the phone (strep, flu, virus, etc). If I was saying something just wasn’t right, LISTEN! And if I’m wrong, I’ll shut up and everyone will get paid.
I wasn’t wrong. Now, what is wrong, everyone disagrees with. I do have an OT and our new pediatrician says he has SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder), which is now clear as day to me. But, everyone says there is more to it than that. It’s just the “more” no one can agree on. So, I say my guy has issues. It’s easier than saying possible Aspersers, or possible NOS-PDD, or possible ADHD or possible whatever.
Now, here I am, coming up on kindergarten round-up, sweating my child with issues. Without a diagnosis, they won’t make accommodations for him until the school says there is a need. He can’t get through school without help. He’ll be OK in the classroom (at least in kindergarten), but not so much during specials—PE, art, music, computers and library. I also worry because he isn’t potty-trained yet. That is one that is bringing me to tears daily. I know it’s normal for my little guy, but life just doesn’t accommodate a five year old who isn’t potty-trained.
Yes, issues. My life revolves around issues. The issues my son has and the issues his issues causes. I try not to plan too much anymore, but I do plan on finding a root cause or help with the issues. My son is sweet, and funny (look out Jimmy Kimmel!), and smart, and cute, and deserves everything every child without his extra issues gets.
